How to STOP Jealousy & Comparison | A Monk's Approach

टिप्पणियाँ

  • Question of the Day: Do you struggle with jealousy and comparison? If so, what are you doing to overcome it?

    • What am I doing to overcome jealously and comparison? I'm watching, listening, and taking notes from your video. You've given me hope so I may become a positive contributor to family, friends, neighbors, colleagues, and society as a whole. Thank you 🙏 ❤️

    • I do, I’m trying to focus on my personal growth and redirect my attention

    • Working on my insecurities

    • Replace the negative thoughts with positive thought. 🥰

    • I have less money than some of my family members. Recently I felt inadequate because I couldn't help out a financially struggling family member as much as others in my family did. I said nothing, but my sister must have sensed what I was feeling. She lovingly reminded me that the amount of my contribution didn't matter-I gave what I could afford, and that makes the gift worth just as much as anyone else's- we each give what we have to give- the amount is irrelevant. Its the gesture of giving and sharing that matters. She healed my spirit that day. I am so lucky to have her in my life.

  • and we can integrate each others qualities on wider projects

  • What would a Monk do it someone tried to hurt him

    • Maybe first do our best to de-escalate the situation.

  • I have learnt alot from you in just few hrs thanks so much for the knowledge I have been so jealousy and uncontetend

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂 glad it was helpful maliza :)

  • Thank you

  • I just discovered your channel and my soul really is thankful for yours. Thank you for your wisdom and for your kindness. Hello from France🇫🇷! Sending love to everyone

    • Thank you so much my friend. I'm glad it's helpful and welcome to the channel :) Greetings from Thailand.

  • You’ve been so Educational on my Journey. Blessed be ❤️❤️

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much evan 🙂🙂🙂

  • Thank you 🙏

  • What a great idea! To sit down with a person and genuinely discuss their good qualities with them 🙏

  • Thank you so much for sharing !

  • Sadu,sadu,sadu. Great talk. I don't remember where I got this "reminder"... "Comparison is the root of much unhappiness". This was the tool that I used when I found myself in that mode of Comparison. 🙏

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • Love this speech so much to unbreak my heart not let my heart break which makes me not like someone. ☺️

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • I never compare myself to anyone but respect everyone because everyone is unique in their own way.

  • and some of the qualities you are jealous of or you want to have you can´t get. And that´s normal too, as we are all different and will never have the absolute perfect set of qualities. And that´s okay too, we are good enough doing the best we can. Also if we aquired all the perfect qualities we would all be the same and how boring would that be!

  • Finally something that isn't one of my problems. I never cared what people thought. what they had didn't bother me either. I am happy being me. I need to change because I'm not perfect ...yet.

  • Dear Nick, I know this will sound very strange - but every time I watch your video, the tears just won't stop and your words are very touching. Thank you for everything.

    • Aww thank you my friend. I'm glad it resonates with you :)

  • 🤞🙏👌🏾

  • I even compare myself when it comes to how good I am at letting go of comparison :( f*ck that

  • Thank you Nick for this one. Your tip about giving space for each person in a notebook is helpful for me. Made me realize that each one of us has it's own strengths - just like in a rpg game, we are here to lend our strengths with each other. We just have to recognize what's ours and gather other people that we can share it with. :)

    • It's a pleasure. I'm glad it's helpful. thank you.

  • This is such great advice and perspective! Thank you, thank you ❤️. I have practiced it before and it is very humbling and humanizing. Nobody is above another.

  • Thank you for sharing. I find you genuinely want to help give us directions/advice. Will try to practice them.

  • Myself and my kids have given help more than anything always but there comes a time when u can’t keep given everything u only can give a little bit

  • I listen to you each day beautiful words I can’t understand why my husband still thinks it’s ok to take his son money that I his mon gave him to save up to buy a house when he gets bigger a very big chunk of money deposit to put down why is it in this day and age my husband thinks it’s ok just to keep his own family there his family and my family in-laws and his family hand out just to keep each of them happy so they think he the best helping everyone else but his own kids and wife

  • Thank you so much! ❤️

  • Too slow

  • As a kind and friendly reminder SOCIAL MEDIA IS FAKE. Remember this always please everyone it is important to know what you started from and came from and just by remembering this I promise you you will feel more powerful

  • Needed this because this generation has me lost sometimes it’s crazy but it makes you really re think it all just to see where you really started from which is your soul

  • Thank you for this teaching....🙏🏼🇨🇦

  • Wow excellent 🙏🏻

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • I don't feel jealousy... I'm already enlightened... Why this stupid recommendation....

  • Great advice, thank you.

    • Thank you Bonnie 😌😌 hope you're doing well

  • Excellent

  • Thanks for the most insightful videos. Would be so nice if you make a video about how people, specially single people, should survive in this ultra sexualized world, from media to public sphere, anywhere you go you see many stimulating and distracting stuffs that they fill the mind over time and making different kinds of mental problems, like sexual depression as the most common. I'm wondering what are the advices of an experienced monk for people who live in this society and always bombarded with stimulating sexual stuffs. If we can't live in an asexual atmosphere like a monastery, and living in a monastery is not the case for us, how we should protect ourselves? Thank you so much!

    • @Nick Keomahavong Thanks! I already know about mindfulness, but it seems to me that the atmosphere plays a critical role. Living in a poisoning atmosphere as we live in decreases or somehow neutralises the effect of mindfulness, especially for we untrained people! I'm wondering is there any other ways that I can talk to you about this, like email? There are many questions that I would like to ask you. 🙏

    • Thank you so much. And thank you for the feedback. To counter these things, we train ourselves with mindfulness to protect our sensor system. This is one of the powerful tools we have access to.

  • The wholesale flame indisputably smile because frost naively extend next a phobic difference. ubiquitous, fluttering bedroom

  • 🙏🏽

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • Does a munk love alone

    • No we live in a community with other monks ☺️

  • Does a mink always love alone

  • This is so eye-opening in a lotta ways to me 🙏 thank you for this awesome video🙏🥰🕉💫

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • Thank you!!!💝💝🙏🏻

  • I dont know how I got here, but I ended up learning alot and I took a few things he said into my life.... Still waiting for the monk to summon all 12 guardian spirits tho

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂and welcome to the channel.

  • Thank you 🙂

  • You mean envy right???? Jealousy is different.

  • They're not keeping this guy busy enough at the monastery. Check out the Venerable Metteyye.

  • Thank you

  • Hi, Nick. I am deeply moved by this video, it has answered so many questions and I feel that as I grow older it will continue to answer even more questions. Bless your kindness to help brighten other people's souls with your knowledge. Anumotanaboon. 🤗💚

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • Thank you :)

    • You're welcome. thank you so much Rei :)

  • Another nice video. Thank you for your golden tips.

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much Saghari 🙂🙂🙂

  • what if this is a loneliness issue, and you have a history of loneliness? lol

  • thankyou 🙏☮❤🌹

  • in-cd.com/chart/v-iy/i4SH1ditjqLKhZI.html

  • 🙏

  • I always remind myself with this quote "No one is you and that is your POWER".

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much for sharing Khrisyah 🙂🙂🙂

    • I love this, thank you for sharing.

  • When you mentioned that both the rich and the poor experience different forms of suffering, I remembered Mark Twain's The Prince and the Tramp.

  • There is nothing more frustrating then people who try to compete with you when you are their friend and trying to help them. People should love themselves as they are don't feel the need to copy others or try and put them down to make yourself feel better. You don't have to put others down to make yourself feel better. Everybody is unique and we should embrace our uniqueness and we are all beautiful intelligent Worthy talented valuable in our own way. Insecure low vibrational bitter unloved people resort to jealousy and comparison out of insecurities.

  • I always think... well, eventually we will all die, no matter what...

  • Thank you so much! I don't suffer so much from envy but I do experience intense jealousy. My significant other is abusive to me, but nice to others and has given other women the type of attention I wish he would give me. So now, when I see other women I fear he is attracted to, I suffer. How to address this?

  • Some people are hateful avoid them

  • Nick, I really deeply appreciate your wisdom and the way you share it. Especially because you come from a world where many of us are still. I have a question; Do you think you could do it the same way if you did not receive all the messages of thanks, respect, and admiration that we send you through our comments? If you can, please let me know your answer? Like always, thank you! Muchisimas gracias!

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂 and yes definitely :)

  • U can't stop jealousy it's instinct

  • I am extremely insecure. I was bullied as a child right upto my teens...the scars are deep. I call this trauma. I was cheated on by partners which only reinforced my feelings of not being good enough and of others being better than me. Im here because I don' t want to feel this way anymore. I know only I can make the decision to allow healing to begin within me...yes i feel that jealousy and insecurity is like a sickness that steals my life force...it takes a lot of energy to live in such a state of self-rejection. Thank you Nick for this message of healing....I hope to absorb it and practice it till it transforms me 💚🌻

    • The most beautiful person to me is a kind,good heart, and an authentic smile. The inner beauty shines way brighter than any outer beauty. The most beautiful person on the outside can be the ugliest on the inside.

    • I’m sorry you were bullied. You are right it is trauma. My father remembers being bullied as a kid because he was poor and wore the same clothes to school. He said they were clean his mom would wash them everyday

  • After Prince Siddharta ( known as Buddha) died over 2500 years ago , his words are taught by millions of people calling themselves ‘ Buddhist Teacher”. These people mostly monks are learning Buddha’s words from various sources and from so many kinds of practices / meditation , scriptures, or by lineage . They are using what they had learned , their skills and their experiences to teach people to know , to understand and to experience Buddha’s words . Their followers will then create a form of “ referrals” in mind and this referral later turned into beliefs or faith . Their followers will use what they have learned or experienced and strive to be the ones they think they should be. So in short , Buddhist Teacher are using Buddha’s words to shape people into “ SOMEONE” and guiding them to chase for ‘ A GOAL “……. To me , this might be the greatest misleading of mankind . I have two points to highlight to all Buddhist Teacher . No 1 : BUDDHIST TEACHER ARE GUIDING PEOPLE BECOMING “ SOMEONE” BUT WHAT IF THE WORDS OF BUDDHA IS LEADING PEOPLE NATURALLY INTO “ NO ONE”? Dear Buddhist Teacher , Human are keeping and holding on knowledge / skills / experience / memories in mind and the mind is like a house full of rubbish and the owner of the house is constantly suffering, struggling to get out from the house but due to his own nature , he is constantly collecting and keeping more and more rubbish into the house …….he continues to suffer from his own nature. Let me ask you a simple question :- What is left in mind if you take out all that you learned , all your knowledge , all your skills , all your experience , all your faith / beliefs and all your memories from your mind? PERHAPS , The one left in mind is YOU ……..so what are you ??? PERHAPS ,YOU are EMOTION , you are desire , you are love , you are anger , you are hate , you are greed , you are will , you are fear , you are ego …. and the words of Buddha is simply like an arrow pointing at YOU not a guide of who you should be. You are always HERE and you should be at peace of what you are …..is you that suffer struggling to be there , trying to be someone . Awaken to own nature , one no longer holds on to anything in mind . The mind will be at ease and this will allow realization to occur . The realization will contract the mind and reduce the growth of emotion . Wisdom is the ability to forget all including own nature . But , Is apparent that all Buddhist Teacher is teaching people to gain more knowledge , more skills , more faith and this is like collecting more rubbish into mind … The mind will expand and like an expanded balloon , the pressure inside the balloon will increase and pressure resembles suffering ….. So Buddhist Teacher is leading people into a path of greater suffering in the name of Buddhism . No ( 2 ) WHAT IF THE WORDS OF BUDDHA ARE NEVER ABOUT KNOWING OR UNDERSTANDING OR EXPERIENCING ? Dear Buddhist Teacher , Like all living , emotion has a natural nature to grow and emotion is feeding on “ referral” to grow and travel in life . Referrals is a form of knowledge / skills / experience / memories / faith etc . Emotion using the physical body as a tool to sense and by a process of thinking to generate referrals. Thinking is emotion in action . We thinking on learning to know , knowing to understand and understand to create referrals . So in other words , human think , human know and human understand in order to create referral and they will use it to grow more emotion and to live . Emotion will constantly hold on to all these referrals in mind and each moment emotion is hopping from referral to referral traveling in life . But !!! Each moment all nature is naturally changing …so holding anything in mind is like trying to block river water from naturally flowing into sea …that is suffering . Buddhist Teachers are causing people to create and hold on to the referral in mind and that is the basis of human suffering. What if the words of Buddha is never about knowing or understanding or experiencing? What if the words of Buddha is about REALIZATION and realization is of the opposite nature of knowing / understanding??? So the more you know, the more you understand, the further you will travel away from realization . So in short , Buddhist Teachers are teaching people to understand and to hold on to Buddha’s words but Buddha’s words are about realization and realization is not something one should hold but rather is a factor that could lead one to naturally let go of what he holds . So , there is a possibility that Buddhist Teachers are like someone giving you muddy water to wash your clothing and let you expect it to be cleaned ……you will suffer from your own nature . My name is Ee Chuan Seng from Malaysia . I am currently at a mind that claims there is possibility that all Buddhist Teacher regardless of their background or nature of their teaching, as long as they teach, they are misleading Buddha’s words. I am here with my real name and a face on my profile. I will be fully and solely responsible for all my claims. I cordially invite all Buddhist Teacher to join me to challenge this possibility . My email is 1988csee@gmail.com

  • Thank you so much for these wise words and thoughts. Makes so many sense 🙏

  • Appreciate this. But when people are intent on doing bad to you, and continually do bad to you, your negative feelings towards them are justified. And they should be made accountable.

  • Thank you so much for sharing this . As someone myself who tend to compare and over think a lot, I appreciate your advice

    • Sadhu sadhu. Thank you so much 🙂🙂🙂Glad its helpful

  • Thank you for this extremely helpful in guiding one to become a better person. I especially like the post at the end where you said "train yourself in a gentle way". Thank you very much. Blessings to you as well🙏

    • You're so welcome! Glad it resonates. Thank you :)

  • This video, as well as the comments, are so insightful when it comes to jealousy and comparing yourself to others. A lot of videos have the similar advice over and over again. This one is a lot different. I love the spreading of love and kindness to others, because I used to wonder why people spread so much love... and now I know why. The hardest part of all is knowing there are some aspects you cannot integrate into your own life. That's where the advice "We're all on different paths with different circumstances" is important.

    • Thank you so much my friend. I'm glad it resonates with you :)

  • I know this is weird but yesterday I had compared myself so much to someone else it paralyzed me and I found myself hating everything I have ever achieved/questioning my own talents because I measured it to their's. And at some point I was hoping they'd fail. It was wrong, I know that but it got to me and I even broke down. For some reason I decided to sit down and journal my bitterness/jealousy onto it, every single thought and feeling onto paper and at the end I was feeling shocked by what I felt. How I measured my worth with someone else's success and how I let it dictate my.mental health. While watching them I lost myself and stopped focusing on growing myself. Thank you for posting this video!

    • Thankyou for sharing this . ❤️

    • Wonderful. I'm glad you were able to take a breath and use it as an opportunity for growth. It's very important and what you did was awesome. Keep up the great work and just keep studying yourself neutrally :)

  • Soooo much to takeaway... I just love your teachings! They say: Oh, You will be the envy of everybody! Me: I do not want that because that means I will be hated by everybody. I learned to short circuit jealousy/envy by verbalizing to that person envied, by telling them emphatically: I am so envious of your this or that--BUT--don't worry, it's a healthy envy! That seems to release me from the sudden pain of jealousy. Everybody gets jealous, even animals get jealous. My cat gets jealous big time. So does my dog. I think there is a ingrained "primal reason" we experience jealousy (such as anger that gets one energized to accomplish a frustrating task, etc.) but, I don't understand as of yet why jealousy is imprinted so strongly into mammals.

    • @Nick Keomahavong 🌞🌈

    • sadhu sadhu. Thank yo so much 🙂🙂🙂

  • I wish I could get counseling from you in person. You are amazing! Calm but extremely powerful energy.

  • The person who always compare and get jealous is a very weak and lazy person.The hard work in the successful people is not seen and talked

  • I really admire the way you speak very clearly sir, my new goal is to learn that way of speaking...;)

    • sadhu sadhu. thank you so much 🙂🙂

  • Any wisdom about suffering ANIMALS IN THE WORLD!??

  • Thank you. I sent this video to a Scorpio rising sun, Leo moon. What I like the most about this video are the practical instructions. I think good advice differs on an opinion when is handled along with instructions.

  • Jay Bhim Namo Budhay 🧡💙🙏

    • sadhu sadhu. Thank you so much 🙂🙂

  • Comparison is the thief of Joy

  • I really look up to you. Thank you so much for all your videos. It really gives me insight to who I am. I have a lot of work to do on myself ❤️

  • Thanks so much for the tips. The one that stood out to me was the one asking about how they have the trait you admire. I tend to compare myself to someone who have a trait I like and all I simply could have done is ask. Not only would that reduce my jealously but could also bridge the gap between acquaintance to friend. Watching all the way from the west coast of Canada!

    • Beautiful leslie. Yes its so interesting because the one that i was jealous of, they became my friends and have been so helpful along my journey. It's great :)

  • I don't feel jealousy.. I'm apathatic as fuck..

  • wonderful thanks for the tips. Hope you obtained the solutions for your self!

  • This video arrived in divine timing for me! Thank you so much for these reminders. I especially deal with the last one: black and white thinking where I forget that other people I’m jealous of suffer as well. I will focus on remembering that. By the way, your laugh fills me with joy ☺️🙏🏻

    • Wonderful Andrew. I'm glad it's helpful 😌😌

  • Brilliant video!! Could listen forever to your wisdom...life is a struggle and if we don't slow down we can't find the riches! Thankyou x

    • Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much Teresa

  • Sadu sadu sadu.

  • 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘MR Nick you are amazing 👏👏👏🔮

    • Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much rozita

  • I've been struggling with comparing and feeling jealous all the time... Thank you for this❤️

  • but when I look at you, I don`t see you as you are, I see myself as I am, right? so, the fact that we see others better or etc. than ourselves actually is good because it is us who is that goodness or betterness we see in others. It`s just that we are unable to see it in ourselves directly, only through/in the other. so, let the seeing be, just no need to compare / want what they have because you already have it too or even more, just need to know it. this understanding negates any jealousy in its root.

  • love thiss

  • This feeling is not jealousy i think its the feeling of not being enough for someone or people the fear of rejection and abandonment so i have to love myself more Although i have been on this journey for 2 years i still have flaws and the truth is i always will i am who i am and i can build my own world which is unique to everyone's life i can change my mindset and be open minded and thats ok its ok we are gonna be ok

  • The magnificent aftershave daily level because pail multivariably level than a shrill confirmation. jobless, aggressive robert

  • Thank you for sharing your wisdom and kindness🙏🏻

  • sorry but some people suffer more than others...and even much more...

  • i dont think anybody will tell the truth about how they get things... or people or whatever....

  • Thank you so much!! It helped a lot (:

    • I'm glad to hear. Thank you so much ☺️☺️

  • I am jealous of that cock...:) it is difficult to concentrate with the cock but it is great... I would like to have one close to my place...

  • Thank you. ❤

  • Anumotanaboon, thank you.

  • Thank u Anumotinaboon

  • thank you brother monk

  • I did fall into that trap of thinking others don’t experience suffering. Going to do my best to do the exercises you shared 🙏🏼

  • Thank you so much for this video . 🙏🏼

  • Thank you for sharing this 🙏🏼💞🙏🏼💞🙏🏼💞🙏🏼💞

    • You're welcome dawn. Thank you 😊😊